I have some wrapping paper (shown on the left) that I bought from my niece in a fundraiser. I liked it because it was colorful, different, and of very good quality. Well, I bought it mostly because she was my niece and this was her fourth grade fundraiser. And as I recall, it wasn’t cheap. It was a fundraiser after all. But that is what family members do, right? They support the young and give up eating for a week.

The problem is that my niece is now twenty-six and I still have the wrapping paper!


It’s not like I haven’t been using it. I have been using it now for what, sixteen years? It just never seems to go away. It reminds me of Elisha’s widow’s oil.

For those of you unfamiliar with the story from 2 Kings 4:1-7, here is a summary with some parts taken from The Message:

(First of all, note that Elisha is a prophet for the Northern Kingdom of Israel.)

A widow called out to Elisha, telling him that her husband was dead and that Elisha knew what a good and devoted man he was.  She said,  “And now the man to whom he was in debt is on his way to collect by taking my two children as slaves.”

Elisha said, “I wonder how I can be of help. Tell me, what do you have in your house?”

“Nothing,” she said. “Well, I do have a little oil.”

“Here’s what you do,” said Elisha. “Go up and down the street and borrow jugs and bowls from all your neighbors. And not just a few—all you can get. Then come home and lock the door behind you, you and your sons. Pour oil into each container; when each is full, set it aside.”

She did what he said. She locked the door behind her and her sons; as they brought the containers to her, she filled them. When all the jugs and bowls were full, she said to one of her sons, “Another jug, please.”

He said, “That’s it. There are no more jugs.”

Then the oil stopped.

She went and told the story to the man of God [Elisha]. He said, “Go sell the oil and make good on your debts. Live, both you and your sons, on what’s left.”

The widow’s faith and obedience allowed God to provide for her and her sons.

Even though I might be a bit tired of the frog wrapping paper now, it is a wonderful reminder of God’s provision for me.A small sacrifice years ago has always provided me wrapping paper in a pinch.

And while a small sacrifice and a step of obedience may not be rewarded with a surplus of wrapping paper or oil, it is always rewarded with a lifetime of blessings.

I've made an important discovery. I have an addictive personality.

At first, I thought ice cream was my only problem, so I no longer keep a tub in my freezer. But it turns out it goes deeper than that.

Over time, I have added more and more games to my iPad. Those that you play on your own. And with each additional game, I saw another hour of my life disappear. After each defeat, it was always “just one more time.” That desire to win was overriding.

As a result, I would go to bed late and tired and with my eyes rolling around in my head. I often felt anxious (a result of today’s version of the “blue light special”––a reference some of you might not understand) and sleep was a long way off. So…I deleted them all. Yup. Every single one of them. I held my finger down until the little icons began their survival dance, and then I pressed down on each little X until the game vanished.

I admit, I have kept one game that requires a friend to respond because I can’t binge on that one. I have to wait patiently until it is my turn to play again. But all the others are gone.

I have to tell you. I felt an immediate sense of release and freedom. I picked up a book I had been wanting to read for quite a while and dug in. It was wonderful. Projects started getting accomplished, too. But guess what?

Every time I sat down to relax and went for my iPad, the urge to reload those games was great. They had always been a nice diversion, and for some people they still are. But for me, the diversion turned into compulsion. So…

Every day now I have to fight the fight. I pray that God help me summon up the strength to withstand the temptation. True, ice cream and iPad games may seem like harmless addictions, but they are still not healthy, and my susceptibility to their charms tells me I could be at risk elsewhere.

I believe all of us have areas of addiction that we have to fight against, some more destructive than others perhaps, but remember, we don’t have to do it alone.

James 4:10 says, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.”

And Psalm 104:19 reminds us that “they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress.”

Stay strong.

A couple of weeks ago I went out to play a quick 9 holes of golf on my own, and by the third hole I found myself behind a foursome with nowhere to go. Everyone had decided to take advantage of the cool weather. The twosome behind me (two young twenty/thirty something guys) caught up with me, and we decided to join forces for my remaining six holes. So we got to talking…

As usual, one of my questions was, “And what do you two do when you’re not golfing?” (A very clever way to ask what they did for a living…or so I thought.)

Both puffed up and proudly announced that they were Stay-at-Home Dads. Their wives had incredible jobs (and they did, trust me) and they loved taking care of their kids. This encounter came right on the heels of my niece’s husband (so my "nephew") getting six weeks off to help with their newborn––and let me tell you––he was a duck to water when it came to taking care of their little one.

Though I am not always thrilled with some of our societal changes in attitude, THIS one I am. THIS one allows a man to be an intimately involved parent at all ages and not lose any man-cards.

A father’s involvement is so important because research shows that dads influence their sons and daughters in some very critical ways.

In short, here are a few things that sons learn from their dads.

1) How to treat women. The first example of how to treat a woman comes from how his father treats his mother.

2) What his strengths and unique abilities are.

3) What his outlook on life should be: how to handle himself, hard times, money, etc.

4) How to lead his family.

5) His personal identity (his place in the family and the world).

And here are five ways fathers influence their daughters.

1) Their future relationship with men. Girls frequently pick mates who are like their fathers.

2) Confidence. Those who have fathers who “praise, support and provide unconditional love give their daughters the gift of confidence and self-esteem.”

3) Academic excellence. Research shows that girls whose fathers are involved in their education or extra-curricular activities do better in both of those areas.

4) To be adventurous and take risks. Though Dads like to protect, fix, and rescue, good fathers help their daughters realize that they are capable of “doing most anything and empowering them to do so.”

5) Body Image: The first view a girl has of herself comes from her father and his comments regarding her looks and others’ looks. Those men who are respectful about how people look help their own daughters’ self-esteem and body image.

Parenting is not for the faint-hearted, nor is it easy to navigate without mistakes. But let’s take our hats off and give credit where credit is due, to all those wonderful fathers out there protecting, encouraging, and loving their sons and daughters.

* * * *

“5 Invaluable Ways Fathers Influence Their Sons.” Powerful mothering.com.

“What Boys Learn from Their Dads.” familyeducation.com

“How Dads Affect Their Daughters into Adulthood.” Institute for Family Studies. 2019

“5 Reasons Dads Are So Important to Their Daughters.” redtri.com

I would like to say that there is much about God I don’t understand because I am not a theologian. But I imagine theologians have just as much trouble with some of the following concepts as I do.

For instance, I struggle with the idea of the Trinity: God in three persons but still one.

I also wonder how Jesus was fully God and fully man.

And then there is the coexistence of predestination and free will. A paradox if I have ever heard one. One that many in our victim-focused society use to believe God is selective and unloving and then blame Him for all that goes wrong (and rarely give credit to if anything goes right).

We know God foreknows all by the following verses:

“…he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will” (Ephesians 1:5)

“For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters” (Romans 8:29)

“Your eyes saw me unformed, yet in Your book all my days were written, before any of them came into being” (Psalm 139:16)

But before we think our salvation is completely out of our control, 2 Peter 3:9 reminds us that “The Lord isn’t slow to keep his promise, as some think of slowness, but he is patient toward you, not wanting anyone to perish but all to change their hearts and lives (emphasis mine).

No, I don’t know how it all works together because, thankfully, I have a God that is so big and powerful that all his attributes (love, justice, omniscience, etc.) are beyond my human comprehension. But I do know this. Every single day I have choices. And every single one of those choices is mine alone to make––as much as I would love to blame others when things don’t go so well.

So probably the best line to help with this predestination/free will conundrum is another line I saw in that perpetual Amish calendar my mother gave me. It read:
​
​“The hand you are dealt is determinism; the way you play it is free will.”